Making a “Great Escape” from an Abusive Relationship
I have ab-so-lute-ly outstanding news to share! The Advocate, the premier—and Number One--international on-line and print LGBTQ media outlet, has just published my commentary on Intimate Partner Violence and Abuse (IPV/A). In this important piece, I discuss my very own personal experience with IPV/A-- and how it has impacted me. Additionally, I reveal why—as both a journalist and author—I’ve [...]
Louder Than The Silence!
WESURVIVEABUSE.COM, the well-respected and go-to-it domestic violence and abuse online resource, has honored Yours Truly by featuring my brand new novel, “Nothing Can Tear Us Apart—FRENZY!” The overarching theme of “FRENZY!” is Intimate Partner Violence and Abuse (IPV/A),which is domestic violence and abuse within the LGBTQ Community. IPV/A--demoralizing and potentially life-threatening behavior--significantly impacts the LGBTQ Community. Tonya GJ [...]
Teens & IPV/A
Recently, I was contacted by Ms. Katie Fitzpatrick, features editor of the Torch, the official site of the Glenbrook North High School student-run newspaper, located in Northbrook, Illinois. Ms. Fitzpatrick had read my Advocate Op-Ed entitled, “Making a Great Escape from an Abusive Relationship,” and wanted to interview me for an article she was co-writing on teens in abusive [...]
Black & Blue (Is That You?)
Intimate Partner Violence and Abuse, or IPV/A, is no joke. Known as domestic violence and abuse within the LGBTQ community, IPV/A is a demoralizing, stigmatizing and potentially life-threatening cycle of behavior. And IPV/A is more prevalent than once was believed: one in four LGBTQ relationships/partnerships is abusive in some way. A recently-released study bears this out. Soon, I’ll [...]
Broken Bones, Broken Dreams—An Update
Cover photo by Don Gillard Towering over me and yelling at the top of his lungs, Antonio, my 6’4”, 280 pound muscled life partner, had me pinned against the wall--his huge, clammy left hand now grasping my neck! I couldn’t move. All the while, the following thoughts flashed in my head: “This can’t be happening! How can the man [...]
“The Comeback Kid”: How Your Abuser Wins You Back
So finally, you’ve managed to make your “Great Escape” from your abuser. (Great Escape is the term I’ve coined for my LGBTQ Intimate Partner Violence and Abuse workshops and seminars.) And after he/she fully absorbs that you’ve indeed found or reclaimed your backbone and guts, the counteroffensive begins in earnest with “plastic” pleas that include, “I really didn’t mean it,” [...]
The Myths of IPV/A
As a journalist and public/motivational speaker, one of my signature issues is Intimate Partner Violence and Abuse (IPV/A)--the term used for domestic violence and abuse within the LGBTQ community. Sadly and too often, this demoralizing, heinous and horrific behavior is “swept under the rug”--particularly when it involves gay/SGL (same-gender loving) men. The misguided belief that “Oh, you know…boys will [...]
“Will It Ever End???,” Part Two
“After years of being beaten and emotionally abused, I managed to gather the strength and courage to leave him. I thought that finally, I was in the clear! But how wrong I was… “He beat the crap out of one of my buddies--to find out where I was! And before you know it, he ‘popped up’ on me, and…” These [...]
Will It Ever End???, Part One
“After years of being beaten and emotionally abused, I managed to gather the strength and courage to leave him. I thought that finally, I was in the clear! But how wrong I was… “He beat the crap out of one of my buddies--to find out where I was! And before you know it, he ‘popped up’ on me, and…” [...]
IPV/A Has Enrolled in College
As a journalist, I’ve made domestic violence and abuse within the LGBTQ community-- generally referred to as Intimate Partner Violence and Abuse (IPV/A)--my signature issue. As well, I conduct IPV/A seminars and workshops across the country. And, this deplorable and potentially life-threatening behavior is the dominant theme of my latest novel, Nothing Can Tear Us Apart—RAGE! Are you aware [...]
Mom Assaults Son Because She Believes He’s “Gay”
As everyone’s aware, as a journalist, my signature issue is Gay Intimate Partner Violence and Abuse (IPV/A). This demoralizing, horrendous--and potentially life-threatening--behavior is heavily stigmatized; thereby, it tends to be grossly underreported. Therefore, I’ve made it my mission to shine a bright light on IPV/A. And just recently, there’s been an unfortunate “twist” or sorts in this [...]
Does Lovin’ Me Include Battering Me?
Kwame Harris. William Ewell. What do these two men have in common? Well, they are (were) Black. And, both men got caught up in separate incidents of the “nasty bizness” of Intimate Partner Violence and Abuse (IPV/A). In his particular situation, Harris was the abuser. In his particular situation, Ewell was the victim. [...]
I Love You To Death, Part Three
The latest installment of my continuing series on Intimate Partner Violence and Abuse (IPV/A) has just been published in the December edition of Baltimore Gay Life (BGL)! Entitled “I Love You To Death,” it’s the topic of The W.O.E. Report--my exclusive monthly column for BGL. “I Love You To Death, Part Three” details how IPV/A victims can make their “Great [...]