Taking All the Time You Need

 Guest Writer: LaToya Hankins  


     Greetings Hot Tea and Ice Sippers, and Happy 2018!  Trusting the New Year has treated you well and the novelty of snow days hasn’t worn off.  It’s amazing how a weather occurrence that brought many of us so much joy when we attended elementary and middle school evokes so much misery now.

     One by-product of weather limiting our activities beyond our four walls is that we find ourselves having to slow down our pace. Since we are sometimes limited to only our driveways or walk-ways, we find ourselves unable to run around and do so much for other people. That’s actually a good thing, although it may not seem like that at the time.

     Too many of us feel so tied to a clock or a list of responsibilities that we must adhere to that we lose sight of the sheer pleasure of taking the time to just be. Depending on whether you are a fan of the Broadway musical “Hamilton” or Grammy winner Kendrick Lamar, sometimes you need to take a break and sit down.

     Recharging your batteries by being still or applying your energy to something that ignites you is priceless–and something we just don’t do often enough. It could be something as simple as being tranquil for five minutes when you are not on your phone, looking at a screen, or updating your social media profile. It also can be taking up a hobby or habit that is strictly for you.

     Take time to treat yourself with the time to do something that feeds you.  Taking time for myself is a New Year’s resolution that everyone should consider adding to their list. It doesn’t require a membership or expensive equipment.  Simply, it’s a matter of saying that taking care of yourself is important–and should be factored into one’s daily life.

     Now, for some full disclosure.  For so long, I was one of those people always on the go who didn’t take enough time for my needs.   Last year was filled with dancing to someone else’s melody, someone else’s tune.  I spent the first quarter of 2017 tending to my mother who was hospitalized most of March.  And, I was balancing the requirements of serving as a sorority graduate chapter president, working a full-time job and nurturing a relationship.

     The rest of the year was pretty much more of the same. When November arrived, I had burned through all my vacation and sick time and could count on one hand the time I spent away from work doing what feeds my soul.  Fortunately, December arrived, presenting the opportunity to take time for myself. 

      I dove into doing not much. I slept late, caught up on movies, and generally lolled around.  

     And it was wonderful! The freedom of it all helped me realize how important it is to take time for myself.

     Not everyone can take a month off the work grid. For some of us, it would be an hour when we send all calls to voicemail. It could be a day where you binge on your favorite foods in your favorite lounging clothes in your favorite chair.

     Maybe you can steal away, go outside, and enjoy some fresh air where the only chatter comes from the birds! The key is to find that place where you can take the time to take a break…and just be.

     Until next time, “Adios, au revoir…and I holler!” 

LaToya Hankins is the author of SBF Seeking, and K-Rho: The Sweet Taste of Sisterhood.  Currently, LaToya is an employee of the State of North Carolina’s Health and Human Services department.  Prior to that, she worked for nearly a decade in the field of journalism.  An East Carolina University graduate, LaToya  earned a Bachelor of Arts degree in journalism, with a minor in political science. 

During her college career, LaToya became a member of Zeta Phi Beta Sorority, Inc., and currently is the president of the Chapel Hill, N.C. graduate chapter. As well, she is an active member of the, The Black Lesbian Literary Collective,a non-profit organization organized in N.C.  The Collective’s mission is to create a nurturing and sustainable environment for Black lesbian and queer women of color writers. 

You may reach LaToya at her on line home, latoyahankins.com ; email, latoya.hankins@yahoo.com;
Facebook, www.facebook.com/latoyahankins;
and on Twitter, @hankinslatoya.