A little more than a year ago, I published “Interview With An Escort,” a raw and revealing interview I conducted with an exclusive and popular NYC gay male escort. This is an update.
I will never share his website and contact information because this article is not about advertising or promoting his services. Instead, it’s to give you, the reader, insight into what tends to be a sexual choice/option for more than a few in the gay/SGL community.
A few years ago, a Huffington Post article entitled, “Sex for Tuition: Gay Male College Students Using ‘Sugar Daddies’ to Pay Off Loan Debt,” featured a New York University student who was desperately trying to manage his $50,000 tuition bill.
His solution? Midway through college, Kirk started turning tricks in order to pay the bill.
And even after graduation, the young man continued to escort. According to that Huffington Post article, “He has continued selling his wares on what he describes as ‘virtual street corners’—websites where young gay men seek out the companionship of wealthy older suitors.”
Kirk is far from the only man, be he young or not-so-young, who’s amongst the ranks of “the oldest profession.” On one of my recent trips to Manhattan (NYC), I sat down with arguably one of that city’s most popular escorts. To “get into his head,” I asked him a wide range of questions.
I’m not using his real name (or the “handle” he uses, for that matter) because it’s not my purpose to give him free promotion. My purpose is to give you some insight into the life of an escort.
Actually, “Jase’s” (short for “Jason”) story mirrors Kirk’s. He, too, got into the “bizness” to settle his college debts. And like Kirk, even after he earned his degree in communications (rather apropos, don’tcha think?), the articulate, sophisticated and charming Jase continues to escort. He’s been at it for nearly seven years now.
The uncommonly handsome, dominant and very self-assured Jase, 30, exudes raw sexuality. And, let’s not even talk about swagger!
At 6’2”, 228 pounds, this African-American is hugely and thickly muscled. He sports a military haircut, ‘stache and goatee. Being well-groomed is his hallmark.
Superbly masculine, he’s very accessible. His dazzling white smile and smoldering eyes are disarming.
Although personable, Jase is all business. You don’t mess with him, you don’t cheat him.
Ya see, he’s all about the money.
WYATT: Jase, thanks for this interview.
JASE: No problem, glad to do it.
WYATT: Let’s just jump right into it. Why did you become an escort? Did childhood experiences somehow coerce, force you into it?
JASE: Oh, hell no! Although you hear that a lot about other folk, that wasn’t the case with me. For me, it’s all about money: after the economy imploded in 2007, there’s a “whole new world order.” You’ve had to find different streams of income. I was drowning in student debt, and I believed that escorting was the best way of quickly getting the most cash possible. (The stud has one helluva deep, melodious voice.)
WYATT: And you continue to escort even after you paid down your debt, after you graduated and found a decent job?
JASE: As you know, graduates have tens of thousands of debt. It’ll take almost forever to wipe it out. That’s the new world order. And even though I was lucky to get a good job, it still doesn’t pay what I would like. So, I decided to continue “seeing” guys. (Then, he flashes a wide grin.) Besides, I enjoy it!
WYATT: Well, what appeals to you most about escorting?
JASE: I’m highly—and I do mean highly—sexual! I like the thrill of being with multiple guys—of different ages, races, body types, personalities. And man, look at me (hearty laugh)—people should pay me to sleep with ‘em!
WYATT: Jase, do you sleep with guys and not get paid for it? Like, “recreational sex?”
JASE: Nope. Not at all.
JASE: (Very seriously now.) Really.
WYATT: I see. Are you gay, or gay for pay?
JASE: Totally gay, totally into men. Been there and done that with women! A woman can’t do anything for me.
WYATT: Jase, describe your clientele.
JASE: Although I’m open to all races/ethnicities, my clientele is mostly white, professional, well-to-do, married. The percentage breakdown is, like, 65 (white)/25 (black)/10 (Latino).
WYATT: You appear to be pretty exact!
JASE: Mos’ definitely! I’m a professional, very methodical. I treat “everythang” (everything) in life as a bizness. You have to.
WYATT: Do you use drugs with your clients?
JASE: Hell no! If a client wants to when he’s with me, that’s cool. However, I refuse to indulge. For my safety, I can’t afford to be mentally impaired. (Pause.) And where anal sex is concerned, it’s condoms all the way! None of this bareback crap.
WYATT: I assume you’re top?
JASE: Oh, so totally.
WYATT: Well Jase, exactly what do you do in bed with your clients?
JASE: I’m a top, both anally and oral. Lots of body contact. I like to deep kiss—as long as there are no breath issues. Heavily into licking and sucking nips. And, I just love tossing salad…before I give my client the main course, if you catch my drift! Also, I get into role playing: daddy/son, prison guard/inmate, etc., etc.
WYATT: What sexual act with a client do you most enjoy?
JASE: Hmmmm…getting my dick s**ked. Hands down! Bro, how I “LUV” the feel of a slick, wet, hot mouth up and down and all over my throbbing, rock hard, juicy “thang.”
WYATT: Jase, our readers and I wanna know: just how BIG are you?
JASE: Nine and a half. Wide and “phat” (fat). Nice mushroom head. Curves to the right. (He chuckles:) Yo, he’s my Buddy! My money maker.
JASE: Lemme stop talking about this! I can get hard at the drop of a hat.
WYATT: On the average, how many clients do you see a week?
JASE: Three, sometimes four. I have a good deal of regulars.
WYATT: So, you get your clients via the internet?
JASE: Definitely. That’s the safest, most efficacious way to go. As you know, I have an elaborate website.
WYATT: You certainly do. Have you ever been busted by the cops?
JASE: Not once, knock on wood! I’m very low key, if you will. If you’re sane in this bizness, sure, you have concerns. You’re must always be vigilant. And, I put potential clients through a detailed, lengthy interview. After that, I can tell if the guy is “on the level.”
Besides, my site specifically states “companionship”—and that’s what the client is paying for. Companionship. Now, being consenting adults, if after meeting we decide to have sex, well…
WYATT: Jase, have you ever found yourself in a dangerous situation with a client?
JASE: Fortunately, no. My physical size and demeanor prevents that from happening. However, I’ve had a couple of escort buddies who weren’t so lucky.
WYATT: What happened?
JASE: Well, one was set up by a cop. Another was raped by a client and his friends.
WYATT: Have you ever been stiffed by a client?
JASE: Two times, and two times only! The first happened the first year I began escorting. A bounced check! (Jase’s ire is rising.) That’s why I NEVER accept checks from non-regulars; a regular is someone I’ve seen for at least a year.
The other time also occurred during my first year. After the session, the client claimed he “left his wallet at home.” I remained in his hotel room for hours, having my way with him—if you know what I mean! (Jase’s expression is simultaneously funny–and scary.) Lessons learned…
WYATT: So Jase, how long do you plan to continue escorting?
JASE: Honestly Wyatt, I don’t know. It depends on the economy. However, if I lose my spark, my desire for it, I’ll be done. I’ll vanish.
WYATT: Jase, thanks for giving my audience a window into what’cha do.
JASE: It’s all good, Wyatt. Now, you’ve gotta become a ghost, ‘cause I’ve gotta “break in” a new client in 30 (minutes)!
A few months after that, Jase took down his escort “shingle,” and pretty much became that “ghost.”
Just a few weeks ago, I decided to re-establish contact with Jase. I wanted to find out if he were still out of the “biz.” The following is the update:
WYATT: Jase. It’s good to speak with you again! How have you been since our last talk? Are you still on the, as we say, “straight and narrow?”
JASE: “Straight and narrow?” (There’s his patented hearty laugh!) A great way of putting it…
JASE: Wyatt, I’ll be honest…
WYATT: I want you to be. (Now, I’m laughing.)
JASE: I’m back in.
WYATT: Whoa! What happened?
JASE: I was fired from my regular gig three months ago. No severance, no nothing!
WYATT: Man, I’m really sorry to hear that.
JASE. Thanks. I saw it coming, and it was quite messy.
WYATT: Any prospects?
JASE: I’m interviewing like crazy! Meanwhile, I got back into escorting. I refuse to be financially compromised. I gotta eat, if you know what I mean.
WYATT: I feel you. Let me ask you: when you find another position, will you continue to escort?
JASE: (Hesitating.) To be honest, I couldn’t tell you for sure. (Long pause.) However, if you’d put a gun to my head, I’d have to say, “yes.”
JASE: Yup. And you know what? I missed all the sex!
WYATT: Can you explain further?
JASE: Look: as I said when we spoke last time, I crave sex…and with multiple guys! And I have to admit that I “get off” on being desired…and being in control, sexually. Point blank period.
WYATT: Well, that says it all.
JASE: It does.
WYATT: Jase, I hope you find a regular job soon, and one that really inspires you. And, be careful out there.
JASE: No doubt, no doubt.
WYATT: Thanks for your time.
I would be interested in knowing more about intimacy and his personal life. I took from the interview that he does to have sex without money being involved so that makes me wonder if he is interested at some point in having a “traditional” relationship with another guy. How would he navigate that given what seems to be an honest desire for the excitement that comes with escorting.
He’s an “innerestin'” fellow, for lack of a different descriptive. If you re-read the first part, he stated that he only has sex for pay; therefore, that “traditional” relationship is out the window (for now , at least). Who knows what the future holds?
Well we all have to pay our bills and has he said the economy is very unstable now especially for 45 year Olds and older so we do what we have to do because we have to “EAT”
I just believe in keeping it clean and being very business oriented in whatever you do. People have to do what they have to do to survive
Thanks for the thoughtful input. My feeling has always been that if the activity is safe and sane, and between two consenting adults and doesn’t harm anyone else, it’s acceptable.
He sounds interesting and if I were to hire and escort he sounds like someone who I wouldn’t mind hooking up with. I always wondered though how they prepare themselves mentally to do this type of work.